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Wednesday, June 12, 2002

By Sarah Billingsley, Post-Gazette Staff Writer

As darkness settles over the Three Rivers Arts Festival, the sizzling ceases, the food booths dim, the crowds straggle home and dirty napkins blow along the sidewalk.

	Linda Burns of Wilmont, Ohio, tries the fries at the Three Rivers Arts Festival. (John Heller, Post-Gazette) Arts Festival schedule 6/12 and 6/13

By this time, after hours of sampling, I feel like Templeton the rat from "Charlotte's Web," in the chapter where he stows away in Wilbur's crate to the county fair. He spends every night cruising the deserted booths, consuming every bit of rich garbage he can find until he is so stuffed he can barely walk.

I think I hear my arteries squeaking.

This glut is a Pittsburgh ritual, signaling the beginning of summer and the festival season. Every year, we complain about the prices, the traffic, the heat, the grease, but nevertheless we show up to buy corn dogs, chicken on a stick, fried vegetables with cheese, pulled pork sandwiches, apple dumplings, cardboard pizza, Blooming Onions, Kettle Kakes and colossal chocolate-dipped strawberries.

Despite flies, the lack of utensils and the messiness, it's a primal experience to wander among watercolors, enameled wind chimes, multicolored vinyl teepees and didjeridoos, gnawing at something on a stick. Carny food has a nostalgic grip on our imaginations.

On opening day Friday, I overheard Steve Karlinchak, information specialist in the Post-Gazette Information Center, say, "Better go today while the grease is still fresh."

Too late for those who didn't make it June 7, but here's the breakdown of what's new, what's missing -- the good, the bad and the ugly at the 43rd Annual Three Rivers Arts Festival.

Newcomers

Krispy Kreme, we're glad to see you. The biggest thing to happen to Cranberry in the past year is the biggest thing to hit the arts festival. The famous doughnuts made a rock star's entrance to the festival, in an 18-wheeler, self-contained doughnut-making operation and store called "Hot Doughnuts on Wheels."

Just as at the store in Cranberry, you can watch the doughnuts crisping in oil and bobbling along the conveyor belts. There's a mobile store where you can purchase $15 Krispy Kreme boxer shorts or pick up a triangular paper hat, worn by scores of children on Friday night, free.

Bob Matthew of Mount Oliver tries his first box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts at the Arts Festival. His reaction: "They're a whole lot better than Giant Eagle's." You can watch the doughnuts crisping in oil at the self-contained doughnut-making operation called "Hot Doughnuts on Wheels." (John Heller, Post-Gazette)

The one-of-a-kind traveling Krispy Kreme truck is operated by a crew of 11 and came to our arts festival via the International Festival in Houston and Memphis in May Festival.

Its crew sells delicious doughnuts -- chocolate glazed, original glazed, iced chocolate with color sprinkles -- for $1 each. A half-dozen glazed doughnuts are $4.50; a dozen $7. A half-dozen assorted doughnuts are $5; $8 a dozen. They also serve coffee and milk ($2.50), perfect for when the doughnuts are hot.

Also new this year, at the Kettle Korn booth, is a terrible marriage of grease and sweet: The fried Oreo. The chocolate cookie is dunked in Kettle Kake batter, deep fried, sprinkled with confectionery sugar and drizzled with Hershey's chocolate sundae sauce. It's a hot, gooey mess that obliterates the cookie texture and melts the Oreo filling. It tastes sort of like a doughnut.

A representative of the booth said they wanted to give people something new to try this year, but as a friend quipped, "You don't mess with a classic."

New at chocolate-covered-strawberry stands, located at the Point and near Gateway Center, are chocolate-covered marshmallows on a stick ($3), coated with colorful sprinkles for kid appeal. The chocolate-covered Rice Krispies treat ($4), rolled in crushed peanuts, was a tad stale but tasty, and easier to eat than the soft cheesecake on a stick, which tends to crumble like a Klondike.

Everything this year seems to be wrapped in a pita or tortilla: the London broil fajita ($8), chicken fajita ($7), chicken on a pita ($5) and shish kebab pita sandwich ($5). At many booths -- such as for London broil and "build your own cheeseburger" -- you can choose your own toppings, usually at a small bar bearing salsa, lettuce, tomato, onion and sour cream.

It's a nice idea to be able to customize, but the problem with these sandwiches, in an outdoor setting, is that they're hard to eat while moving around, messy and drippy, and the toppings bar concept is unsanitary with such large crowds.

The good

I recommend the Italian sausage sandwich, piled with grilled green peppers and onions, slathered in mustard, on a good roll ($5).

At the multicultural Texas barbecue/Greek food booth, the combo platter ($7) features grilled white meat chicken; green, refreshing tabbouleh; hummus; a pita; and warm, tangy grape leaves.

Fresh, hot, hand-formed pretzels ($2.50) at CK Pretzel Works, Bavarian-style frosted nuts or salty sweet Kettle Korn (small $2, medium $4, large $6) make good snacks.

Lemonade, with its thick sugar sludge at the bottom of the cup, is sweet and refreshing (small $2, large $4), as are the strawberry, peach or strawberry-peach smoothies of fresh fruit frapped with ice. The small size is $4 and the large is $6, but consider yourself warned: The large size is served in a tall, test-tube-like smoothie bong that's a bit awkward to carry around and drink from.

Even though it's dark meat, the chicken on a stick has a good, sticky teriyaki sauce and a nice charred flavor. The booth offers sriracha, a very spicy chili garlic condiment that makes a delicious, fiery dipping sauce.

The bad

The haluski ($3) was gummy, with flavorless cabbage, swimming in Liquid Gold butter flavoring, and our serving contained a short black hair. Skip it.

My opinion of Seiver's shoestring fries -- available by the bucket ($8) or in small ($3) and large ($5) sizes -- was confirmed by several co-workers: They're soggy. McDonald's is right down the street.

Plates of chicken- or shrimp-fried rice, very expensive at $6 a pop, are bland and uninteresting, but good for those who might be on a special diet of avoiding spicy foods.

The ugly

For shame! How can a Pittsburgher eat a corn dog doused with Super Value brand ketchup? This is Pittsburgh, hon, so it's gotta be Heinz.

Missing

What's a festival without cotton candy or candy apples? Where are the delicious crepes, filled with of bananas and strawberries and slathered with Nutella, a chocolate-hazelnut spread, that were well worth $5 last year? And sweet, hot, All-American roasted corn, even at $3 an ear, should be a Three Rivers Arts Festival staple.